As I begin this new/old journey I feel that it is incumbent of me to make a statement about the duplicity that, at least I, struggle with mentally. And, to be honest, I would be hard pressed to believe that we do not all face the issue of the duplicity of the mind.

Our yin and yang, good and bad, there is a bit of darkness in the light and a bit of light in the darkness.

One evening, an elderly brave told his grandson about the battle that goes on inside people.

He said, “My son, the battle is between two Wolves inside us all. One is evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, gilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority and ego.

The other is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.”

The grandson thought about this for a moment and then asked his grandfather:

“Which Wolf wins?…”

The old brave simply replied, “The one that you feed.”

I love this old story.  If you take a moment and look back through the list of good and bad the old brave noted you will see most of our good and bad traits are there.

For far too long in life I fed the bad wolf. I spent my time locked in my mind and allowing every simple misstep or comment to sway my view of myself and the world.

One day I decided to stop feeding that wolf. I began heaping great mounds of “wolf-meal” to the good wolf. Don’t think that he did not have to fight the bad wolf for that food. He still fights him daily.

I still have a very dark side of my mind that does not only self-deprecate, but it is that part of me that is bestial and vicious in nature. However, there too is value in that part of my duplicity that I have had to learn how to meter out.

Self-confidence is driven out of this part of the mind and allows me to stand up for what is right even under great onslaughts of contrary social pressure.

Learning to cultivate both parts of who we are mentally keeps us balanced and able to draw upon the strength inherent in both. Tapping the warrior and the priest at the right time and in the right circumstance can be invaluable in the world today.

However, if we allow one too much sway we can easily be eaten from within by the bad wolf or beaten down by the world if we never allow him to prowl. Yes, it can be argued that there have been those (Gandhi, Mother Teresa) who many would argue only fed the good wolf. However, if you truly read of their lives they understood how to draw upon the strength of the bad wolf but knew to ever vigilantly keep a hand upon its leash.

Duplicity, at one time, I saw as a very bad thing. However, now I know more and understand that there is value in duplicity when kept in check. Feeding either aspect of our nature can be detrimental. Learning to balance them, allowing a little light in the dark and a little darkness in the light provides an approach to life that values strength in compassion and compassion in strength.

Which are you maybe feeding too much?