2 Corinthians 12:7-10New International Version (NIV)

7 …Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. 8 Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10 That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Least you think this is purely a religious thing and turn away, take a moment and read on.

I have a number of thorns in my life, but the most predominant of which seems to be my work life. Now before you look closely at this part of my life and scoff because by any standard I have been very successful in my work life. Furthermore, I have been given gifts of writing (well, I think I have!) and the ability to mentor others which has added to what I believe is a pretty successful and significant life.

However, this has not come without a cost.

My wife will tell you that there are times, this week being one, where she thought that my professional life was killing me. Crushing me at the very least. And, for all intents and purposes, she is right.

I have had periods throughout my professional career where I have had to take prescription medicine for stomach problems. I have battled anxiety, depression, fear, anger, frustration and abject terror in the name of making a buck…and trying to make a difference.

I say make a difference because I have never viewed my work life as simply a job or simply my career. I have tried to make a difference in others lives. I have striven to be a good worker, leader and friend to those whose I worked for, with and over.

Trying to make a difference by being, what today is more and more an uncommon thing in the work place. A caring and compassionate leader, mentor and guide.

Additionally, my dad instilled in me a work ethic that promoted hard work, honesty, straight forward dealing and integrity. All of which are in short supply and not greatly valued in today’s business world as any media outlet will show you on a nightly basis.

Hard work, keeping your nose clean and to the grind stone are an archaic idea. Yet, they are what I know and what I live by and what causes me, more often than not, the thorn I bear.

A friend this week told me “You have to have boundaries”. Which I do not in my work life. Because I have typically run support organizations that are also tasked with architecture and project delivery, my life is one of continual deadlines and problem solving.

At one point this was a very highly valued commodity. But today, a single error negates months of continual delivery and calls into question everything I work daily to embody.

My lack of boundaries and my roles crushing delivery requirements means that no time day nor night, 24/7/365 are off limits. Vacations and holidays are simply dates on a calendar. I have only one sancta-sanatorium; When I am on my bike with ear plugs in riding.

And even then, if my phone is in my pocket I feel it’s continual vibrating call to respond.

I often ask myself what I am to do when my thorn and my livelihood are one in the same.

I wonder at times at the sanity of doing something that I watched, in a slightly different field, take from my father. To the point that it effectively killed him.

I know that this thorn keeps me humble, and for that I am thankful.

That may seem odd, but I witness (even this week) the vicious demon that unbounded success can be to a person. I know my personality and understand that this is a thorn that God has given me to keep me humble and what is needed to hone me into the man He wants me to be.

Whether you see this as a “God thing” or not, I believe even the wildly successful, the beautiful and happy people in life have their thorns. It is what keeps us human and regardless of our wealth, health or prosperity there is something in this world that needles us, pricks our souls and reminds us of what we should remember that we are human.

I am trying to, as the military say “embrace the suck”. To accept my thorn and allow it to mold me and shape me without breaking me. It has at times. I cannot lie about this. I have lain bleeding and broken on the floor of life, licking mental and spiritual wounds that never fully heal.

I do, as my friend said, need to establish some boundaries. I tried this week and limited myself and by the end of the week found myself quite behind in a number of areas. But I cannot work 24/7. I must have a mental break to recover from the battle.

I am trying to understand and thus better accept this thorn. Accepting that through it God is honing the person He wants me to be and making His power manifest in my weakness.

Furthermore, on a secular level, I too understand that this thorn also keeps me from pushing myself (as I have in the past) into roles where it is even more prevalent. The higher you go in the pecking order the more pervasive the lack of boundaries become. We become bound to our careers and they define us, they are where we put our entire value as a person.

This is most unhealthy and and lead to crushing disappointment.

Being defined by a “position” is not what we are called for in this life. As the old adage goes, no one ever ended their days thinking “I wish I had spent more time at work.”

Ask yourself what defines you what are your thorns, what are they teaching you. If our thorns are not teaching us, we will be given ever greater teachers.

And that, my friend, is a frightening thought!