Over the years I have been plagued with a common malady that effects many people around the world. It may be rampant enough to be considered a disease, or maybe it would be classified as a mental disorder. At the very least it is like a skin rash that won’t go away.

I have been plagued by the “Oughts’”.

You too may have this malady to one extent or another. I actually even make list of my oughts’. I call them “To Do” list, but they really should be called “Ought To Do” list, cause I never seem to get through them all. Many items I find stay on my list for weeks, months, even years.

It’s not that I am a procrastinator. I just end up with so many things on my list that I never really get to them all.

Furthermore, many of my oughts’ are really life changing. I ought to finish that book. I ought to lose weight and get in shape. I ought to change my lifestyle…and on and on.

I really do not want a life made up of oughts’. I really want to get to the life changing oughts’.

But I allow life to continually get in the way. I get to “busy” to get to the most important oughts’.

As I really began to consider this I started getting really depressed and angry with myself.

I looked down at my, not substantial, but noticeable belly (I am just vein enough to care that it is noticeable when I stand up).

I considered where I was in life right now; looking for a job, having not finished a couple of book ideas (writers are notorious for starting book projects and not finishing – that is why so many of us are writers and not authors).

I think the oughts’ look worse when you are facing life change. They begin to look like regrets.

This is the point where it is easy to slip into that depressive state and think; what should I have done.

Yes, I ought to have exercised more. I ought to have exercised some political constraint and been what others expected more in my career. I ought to have worked harder on my relationships….and on an on.

But this is not a time to look back at my oughts’ it is a time to look at the oughts’ that add value and turn them into an action plan for the future.

I am not unhappy with the person I am, for the most part. Yes there are things about myself and my personality that I would like to change. I have the potential to change all of them, but some of them are part of my personality and personality is the hardest thing to change.

Furthermore, some of those personality defects are drivers for me. People do not necessarily look at what some consider bad personality traits and learn how to make them drivers. I am unabashedly a redneck. To be fair, part of that is selective personality and part of it is DNA. You see I have been given a dose of DNA that is not conducive to not having a strong personality; my lineage has been traced back to steersmen from the Viking ships, I am Texan by birth (and by choice), my great, great grandmother was full blood Creek Indian, and Sam Bass (the bank robber) is a not too distant relative.

Regardless of whether you have an extreme personality or not, there is a way to change your oughts’ that you and I both have to employ to make the change;

Operative of “Ought” is “Thought”.

Manufacturing personal change is as simple (and as difficult) as changing your thoughts. Oughts’ simply can’t change without changing your thoughts.

My coach says, frequently to me, “you can’t change your future with the same mindset that created your past”.

This is quite true (even if it is hard for me to keep in mind).

So, pick one ought today. Completely change your thoughts around that ought. Start fresh with a completely new thought. Just one, and focus your being on that one positive thought around that ought. Every time “Ought to” comes to mind around it, change it to “Thought to” (directed thought).

Most importantly, tell someone else. Tell them what you are changing and ask them to check in with you frequently about it.

Thoughts change Oughts.